Excuse my inherited ignorance of the details of all the various species*, but I do know that there are certain types of spiders, or perhaps other insects, which live to breed and then die immediately after giving birth. Even salmon do something similar, but the insects I’m referring to are more blatant about it.
I feel very similar to them. I’m devoting my every last drop of energy to creating my contribution to my species – doing my share of passing on the tradition – with total disregard (although not without hope for a miraculous exception) for benefiting from it any way before I die.